The mind-numbing op over (I’ll stop griping about it when they stop putting it before every episode), the episode proper opens to Winry and the others sitting around a campfire attempting to decipher an ancient manuscript, which may or may not be encrypted! Thrilling. After a few seconds of this, Al wakes up. Finally. After a through explanation of the situation, which the watchers are spared, Al is reassembled. This gives May the idea to break apart the book and start an impromptu game of “go fish” assemble them by their purpose.
Turns out that they already knew all of this (not that suprising, considering the sheer amount of dialogue), so the documents are worthless and it’s a wild goose chase. But wait! Al notices that hey, there’s more to these documents than meets the eye! Just like the last two times. After a Sneeze Ex Machina and a horrid pun, they finally realize that the paper is printed on both sides (as I’ve found out the hard way with many a test). This reveals the new, nearly-identical transmutation circle with the power of both Eastern and Western Alchemy. Title card drop. 6 minutes and two paragraphs worth of text in.
Back where the action occurs, Kimblee explores the mines looking for Winry and company. However, he runs into Pride and is tasked with “carving a bloody crest” into Briggs. Carve a bloody crest is the phrase, my dear. We can’t just say “go kill a ton of people”. That’s not proper. One must carve a crest, as a proper nobleman. A similar thing is happening in the West. We’re reminded of Ed’s condition (which is nice, as the main character hasn’t been on screen yet), and get one of the more uneccessary flashbacks, reminding us of the horrors of trench warfare. Except that it isn’t trench warfare. And none of the people we care about are rank-and-file grunts, except for Mustang’s “old” team. (That was, what, ten episodes ago? “Old” team? Really?) At the end of this conversation, Sloth finally finishes the tunnel. Eyecatch.
After the break, we’re dumped back with Rosa and Hoenheim in Lior (you remember Lior, right? It’s not like it’s been 30 episodes since it was mentioned… oh wait). After a much-needed recap of events, Hoenheim is introduced to the same church that Ed and Al fought the high preist of Lior in. At least, they did so in some continuity. I still like the Birdman of Lior story from the first too much to give it up. Hoenheim ventures beneath the church, breaks through the wall, and finds none other than Pride waiting for him.
One somewhat-interesting chase and poorly-explained escape later, Hoenheim and Pride settle down for a civil chat on the purpose and nature of homunculi. A few minutes later (yes, actual minutes), Hoenheim leaves a message for Father. And what a message it was. There may or may not be a confrontation regarding something or other at some future date. Back at Briggs, the Drakman army is on the attack, led by none other than Kimblee. I honestly did not see this one coming, and I say that without sarcasm. As the cannons fire, the ending theme plays.
Ugh. TEXT TEXT TEXT. It’s not quite approaching Code Geass levels, but the way it keeps changing scenes and the sheer omghuge of the script, it’s coming close. Rating: 8.5/10. Yep. I actually dropped it points. Even though the next episode promises action, the last episode promised action, and did we get action? No. We got more talky. So, it’s an enjoyable faux-action series, but it’s not at the pulse-pounding rate of… actually, does anyone know of a decent action series that doesn’t involve buckets of blood or megs of dialogue? Comment or mail me. (I actually check comments now. For reals.)
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